It's 26th of the month again... It used to be the most memorable day in OUR life. Used to be...
I wonder if he will ever remember this date?
It's been another 6 days since I last updated.. How time flies? I still remembered the last time when I uploaded a picture of us in Instagram and you commented that "Time flies like rocket". It's been 2 freaking year of me intruding into your life and my life.
But in a blink of eyes, you eliminated me from your life... and accepting a new one.
I could still remember what happened right in front of my eyes exactly one month after we broke up.I struggled like hell. I can still feel the pain at my heart... even until now.
I don't know if you ever put that in mind that I'm trying to get you back or what. But it just...
It hurts so bad when I gotta face the truth right in front of me. I can't even accept it until now.
Why on earth do I have to face this. Everyone deserve a second chance, but why wouldn't I?
I've always said that I know there will be someone else out there who will love me and dear me in the future. But at the same time, I just couldn't let go of all those memories yet. Memories.
I feel like forgetting everything like how drama does it. Lost of memory and such.
Or blah blahhh. To gain your mercy and stuffs. But another question is up... Worth it or not?
Like now, who's the one in pain and why am I still so stubborn.
I always said that I will find someone else.. But my mind and soul is stuck with the memories.
How to look forward my dear?
I don't know how long more will I ask question like this.. Probably gotta wait until the feeling is gone or what. The feeling feels a little shaky, but still... I'm still in love with him after so long and he's in love with someone else all these while.
Can the situation go any worsen?
So many things happened in the past 6 days... There were too much of up and down. Emotional break out once awhile. But luckily I still have many people around me to comfort me... Xy has always been the one who guide me through. Thank you my love!
We definitely had long chats and she'll never fail to cheer me up. I feel much much better every time after I talked to her... Or even, when I feel like expressing to him, she is my another alternative to leave my comment to. Well, some of you will wonder how does it work but to be able to express and yet not being ignored by him...It's more than enough regardless if he know what am I trying to tell. She know almost everything about me now.
She is the one who will be reading all my silly silly message to him, tears and sorrow.
I feel bad that I always used to have bad impression on her. But after all these,
I know who's best for me. I'll try to change to have better understanding and tolerance.
The other day when I was in the mood to greet him, I sent him a fb message saying,
"Heyy, how are you doing? :)" but he didn't reply even if he has seen it. ..
I told darling about this and she scolded me "sohai". She is worried If this would result me being all silly.
This pain, is beyond bearable.
I hope I can get rid of this/him asap. I know I can live happily ever after even without him.
Please give me a strong heart.Life's good. Everyone is treating me like how it used to be. Feeling loved.
As I feel a little upset about today, I told Pretty and she showed me some florist catalogue... She said it is for my convocation flower :)
Everyone loves me and I don't see the reason why I should still continue crying over someone who doesn't even care any more. I hope I could get over this as soon as possible or probably you will come back in the future? Will it be?
Nonetheless, 26th... shouldn't be any memorable day to me.
Today is such a teary day... It feels like I can cry at any time. No joke.
Man tai,
I love you, as always. Bye.
Till then.
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