Thank goodness to my friends and family who has given me their best to me throughout this long and painful journey of mine. Time passed really fast and soon, most of my friends will start their new chapter -- working in a bit.
I'm still undecided what and where am I really going to work, and I can only hope for the best in me! :)
I see lots of opportunities for me and I'd hope I will find whatever I wanna do in the fast future tooo!
Back to the topic, Yeaaa, it is about what am I up to recently again.
Reading back my own words, It made me realised what has happened and hopefully I will be stronger day by day... Also, another highlight for this post...
I think I've a crush on someone? I, myself is not clear whether it is real, but yeaaa, it does feel like it.
Just like what happened with him last time. But one thing about this is that, it is obvious that someone else has fall in love with him and I don't know how should I see myself.
I mean, I'm not sure if I really like him or it was just a illusion? But as far as I'm concerned.. .
I do feel like talking to him and sometimes, it seems like that fellow has a little crush on me too -____-
Not sure Not sure. Probably he is just all good to everyone like this, but.. hmmm..
Hope for the best yea?
Even so, I'm not sure even if I still loves him as much as I used to. Probably yes, and probably no.
As what I have mentioned earlier, I hate to see things about him but sometimes, I can't help it to stalk at him facebook -___- Wth.
And as much as I'm trying to get rid of him, I started to see "funny things" in him. Asking why didn't we invite him for events and stuffs or even, liked the pictures I posted. Why?
Just as I wanted to be normal and gets closer to you, you give me shit. But when I'm almost fine, you started to come back? I do not know if you really wanted to come back or what. But, out of sudden.. You started to like my pictures and stuffs.
Hey, have you really considered my feelings? Anyway, I ain't got no time for stuffs like this. I'm getting pissed day by day or the shits that you threw to me. Worse of all, I hated it when I see you both communicate or whenever I see both of you. You are just the pain in the ass for me.
If someone would asked me again, do I still want him back?
I MAY say no for now because I hasn't seen him for quite sometime and I feel all good. But things may turn upside down if he so happen to show up infront of me again! -_-
Why is this happening?? I'm still clueless on what I want and don't. In fact, I'm suspecting to have a crush on someone and I'm not too sure what exactly it is. But I do understand that... Once you started to fall for someone ELSE, the past... no matter how long it was... a weeks, 5 days or whatever shit,
I actually have that feeling for a short while, but I know it wasn't right to do so. As in,
I was so blardy hurt the day before and I'm fine suddenly with someone else?
Mannnnnnn.. I'm not you! I just couldn't do it! But, All I did was.. I told the one which I suspected to have a crush on that, I couldn't lose him anymore. I have lose enough of my dearest friends.
I didn't want to spoil our "relationship" now, so I will only be enjoying the moments as a friend or whatever and we shall see by then. Maybe?
Anyway, it is 26th again tomorrow. A day which I used to look forward every month. But now,
it mean nothing to me nor him. Damn, when can I get over you?
I don't know if I'm still loving him, but because I don't see him now, I'm feeling all right.
I DON'T KNOW WHAT WILL HAPPEN IF I SEE HIM? TORNADO? OR VOLCANO maybe?
Silly girl, silly.
I hate him and I love him. Sei soh mui.
You mean NOTHING to him. NOTHING.
Heart changed and I will never get back again.
More and more craps coming up.
Till then.
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